Wednesday, August 30, 2006

THE EASY BUTTON

I had one of those trips home this morning from the church preschool that you don't remember. My general statement about those is that I'm guessing I'm a better driver at those times than when I pay attention to what I'm doing. Who knows. It's an educated guess because when I look back upon those trips I've never wreacked havoc, and I've always taken the proper steps in my line of fire. All I know is that suddenly I found myself in the garage. (In proof of my point, the garage door was closed, the sideview mirrors were tucked in, and the headlights were turned off). Back to sitting in the garage . . . tapping my fingers on the steering wheel to Pat Benitar.

So there's too much going through me pea brain. When the car stops and my brain doesn't, rhythms are clearly askew. Same as the old joke what's the last thing that goes through a fly's mind when he hits the windshield? His butt. Well. There's a parallel there but I will not draw it.

Good thing I'm doing small repetitive tasks this morning. It'll give me time to clear out the discombobulation.

Funny thing is the overwhelm-ination usually stems from not too many big things on my to-do list, but on the contrary, too many ticky-leetle-beety things to do. They pile up like little crumbled up receipts in your handbag, crumbs in the floorboard, or hot wheels on the carpet. I can handle large tasks, because they're nice and clean and clear. Do one. Ha. DONE. Vvvvvvvp. Mark it offffah the list..... But these little $*^)#@$*% buggers, maaaaaan. They're MESSSSSSYYYYYYYYY. I do not WANT to call the insurance guy. I do not WANT to file that. Don't wanna go to the bank. Noooooooo, I do not WANT to bend over and pick up this. . whut the heck izzzz zat. . . . . now whut did I come upstairs for, anywayzzzzz?

My galpal said yesterday, "You need an easy button." The remark came because I'm planning an upcoming annual birthday bash for my son, my brother, and my mother in law that grows in attendees every year. It has already grown out of bounds for my home, but continues to grow at not an alarming rate, but at a steady pace, with the addition of two or three people each year. Last year we were forty something I think. I should cut the invitation list off somewhere, but I can't. Maybe I should say no when someone asks "Can I bring great aunt Mary?" But why would I? Whasss the point? So what if we bump into each other? So the kids sit on the floor to eat. No one's complained yet. In fact there's an abundance of laughter. Soooooo much laughter. Everyone always wants to come back, and clearly some want to bring more. It's not because I give a good party. I don't do anything but cook and set the food out. It's our families. My family and my husband's family together make a dynamic duo that is something to be witnessed. It is a combination that was planned by God (no kiddin'). It's a party waiting to happen. Somebody has to get the two groups together, it'd be a sin not to. If you don't think you marry your spouse's fambly, we are the poster children by crackey. Last week my neighbor asked when the big birthday bash would be. He wanted to make sure he wasn't going to be out of town.

Last year we had water balloon fights. It was my 8 year old son's idea, and mostly the children participated, but. . . . my 50 year old sister in law turned to my 3o year old brother afterwards and said "Well - should we have the wet t-shirt contest now?"

The year before it was pie throwing contests. The children play baseball or monkey-in-the-middle in the yard, their parents sit on the deck, their parents sit in the kitchen, and their parents sit in the family room or the dining room.

Why would I need an easy button for that? Besides. That's just more clutter. Where would I put it??!!!

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